Saturday, February 14, 2004


posted by Michael Piwonka 3:54 PM
I'm scheduled to have a "no scalpel" vasectomy this Friday. I'm not quite sure what the "no scalpel" part is about, but it's supposed to hurt less, bleed less, and just be an all-around joyful occasion.

I've been reading the literature I've been sent, relishing what it calls lay terms, most notably the "cleaning of the pipes" for several months after the procedure. After frequent and thorough cleansing, I will officially be worthless to the species.

Evidently there is a 1 in 2500 chance the the vasectomy won't be successful (the "snipped" ends of the vas deferens could grow back together). While those odds are low, that's disconcerting. (If I had another child after the vasectomy, my mother would be compelled to call it a miracle. I'd be compelled to call a lawyer.)

According to my instructions, I need to get a scrotal supporter. Is that what is commonly known as a jock strap?

Oh yeah. Happy Valentines Day, Penny.


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random. arbitrary. completely unnecessary. yet refreshingly therapeutic.

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